Hadriel87

Wow, it has been a long time since i posted anything... well, i got inspired and i happened to have free time when i did... turns out i like drawing my girlfriend

Didn't really got to updating this dev profile as much as i should... So anyhow... stuff has been good... really good. Guess i have my epic GF to thank for... She is actually playing Eve with me.. not sure if anyone gives a shit but yeah... shes epic and I'm happy for it. On a different note i now work as a fireman in a local industrial fire-department... Does not pay even half as much as my military job but at least I'm home and i have shit loads of free time. My dark thoughts are still with me but i focus on other stuff now. There will be more stuff to post in the future but i just want to wait a bit until its all finished so i can brag about it properly

I just found out that i am a walking contradiction... or at lest a realy odd person... As it happens my work in the army leads me to do alot of ... well lets just say not so nice things... hell, realy bad things when you look at it... And than you got me... same person... always being chierfull like i have lived in land of rainbows and silly hats for 32435463938 years... (thats borderline insanity). I catch my self staring at the sky for hours... daydreaming... than just like that i can be in action, few hours after that, doing what i do... adrenalin pumping to the max... than i get home and all i can think of is "uuu skyrim is here in a few days" or ''wow... that sky looks wonderfull...'' blood stains from "work" still all over my uniform...  than i have times like this.. when i look back and realise what i have done... and wierd thing is i dont care... not for a single one of them... i dont like it... i dont dislike it... dont hate it nor love it... i just take them as is... cold hard fact... than i realise i havent been scared or even tought about my own death the whole time... when it is my time its my time... i guess... but why aint i scared... scared like every time i get when trying to talk to a girl... aproaching a girl in person terrifies me... it feels like someone is pulling my liver out and tickling my kidnies from the inside at the same time... and scared of death... my own death... NOPE... not a single thing... and this... see how grim and dark i get... and yet im cheerful... playful... also quite childish... maybe thats it... maybe i understand all of this but at the same time i dont comprehend it... maybe im just fucked up... hmm... i'll be doing some more thinking....

hmm... had this for more than a year now and just tonight i decided to upload some of my works... sure i had those stories.. but that was a minor thing... hope people will like my stuff... i sure as hell like a lot of stuff here... a lot of talented guys and girls... keep it up... i might as well..